The Solemn Oath

          I have become exceedingly brilliant at a particular routine over the past few weeks. This is how it usually goes. A magnificent idea is cooked up inside my brain. It’s beautiful; a soufflé of a story, perfect in its simplicity yet you can clearly see the genius behind it. I skip and hop towards my laptop, excitement beaming out of me because I have a new story for my blog and it’s going to be the funniest, most fantastic entry ever posted by any blogger so far.

            Then as the laptop starts up, and I stare into the blank page that is aching for my words to be laid on it, my mind freezes over the pressuring task of turning this amazing idea into a coherent narrative. Brain tilts and soufflé idea inevitably deflates until it looks like sad pudding.

            I try my best to stay positive, thinking the idea will come back to me in its perfect splendor like it did before, but every time I have a vague flashback of what the story could have been, I realize the original pizzazz is gone. All I will be left with is a cheap replica that is trying really hard to convince you it’s as great as the original you never got to read.

            This event repeats itself a few times a week with intervals of searching for inspiration from other blogs and forums. But the efforts have been futile.

           After more than enough weeks of staring at a blank page that is sick and tired of looking back at my confused face, I had an epiphany. I quickly understood the reason why stories keep seeping away like sand running through my fingers. I don’t have an obligation, a contract that obligates me to write frequently and therefore, ignore all the creative excuses I come up with at the moment of typing the first few letters.

            I really need to tidy up my room.  (Never end up doing it.)
            Whoa, who am I? (Shakespeare is not impressed, I’m sure.)
             I don’t have the right music on.
            Holy crap! The Fifth Element is on for the one hundred millionth time!

            There can’t be any more excuses or ruined soufflé ideas. So as of this moment on, I do solemnly swear to get  over my intense interest of repeatedly watching The Fifth Element and post at least two entries per week until my brain is as shriveled and empty of creativity as a raisin (raisins are pretty uncreative). After that, I’ll go back to watching the same movies over and over again until I can flawlessly repeat the dialogue.

            PS. You didn’t really care about this oath, did you? Yeah. Thought so.

            PS. You didn’t really care about this oath, did you? Yeah. Thought so.